Get Off the Work-Life Balance Seesaw

Originally written for corporate execs, this entry is still quite good for our purposes. It is followed by some tips you can use to make your own work environment a happier, healthier place to be.

The term work-life balance implies that work and life are on opposite sides of a seesaw or scale and one must be weighed against the other. But employees cannot shed one and take up the other on respective sides of the time clock. We bring our lives to work and we take work home.

Many of our corporate leaders are of the Baby-Boomer generation. They have sacrificed nearly every aspect of their personal lives for the sake of their careers. For them, work-life balance naturally means more emphasis on the life side of the seesaw and our efforts to date have focused on facilitating the life side of the see saw.

There has been a lot of work done on the multi-generational work place. All of it points to the fact that the seesaw illustration of Work-Life Balance does not have the impact that employers hope because while it makes sense to the decision making baby-boomers, it may apply to the rest. At best, many work-life balance initiatives are temporary quick fixes of situations that present themselves in such a way that the costs associated with ignoring them are prohibitive.

Once we accepted the need to accommodate very complicated life situations, we made great inroads. Programs like flexible schedules, job sharing and telecommuting have proven themselves with positive ROI. These are now the givens, not the innovations.

Balanced life initiatives should be made for the purpose of making our companies employers of choice, attracting and engaging top talent for the long term. Achieving such a goal requires more than quick fixes, it demands a shift in the way we construct our work cultures. We must address the needs and perceptions of everyone in the organization. We need to make the workplace fulfilling enough to encourage Baby-Boomers to postpone retirement long enough to pass on what they know. We need to assuage inherent distrust and resulting lack of commitment of Generation X since they are next in line for the helm. We also need to create work environments that nurture the Millennial Generation so that they stay with us long enough to become effective day-after-tomorrow leaders

Savvy leaders are no longer looking at ways of getting people out of the office but we are looking at ways of making the office the place everyone wants to be. Work-life balance is now about balanced lives and the role organizations play in the lives of their associates. Companies are now realizing that in order to better insure their longevity and success, the human organizations that comprise them must become inclusive communities of engagement and commitment. And that means reworking our understanding of our corporate cultures.

So the essential myth about work-life balance that we must dispel is the perception that work and life are two opposing forces on a seesaw. There is no seesaw. There is no distinction between work and life. One does not counterbalance the other. The time clock is not a magic portal between two realities. Both sides are one reality for the person punching the clock. If we expect our companies to survive and thrive, we need to acknowledge and develop the kind of corporate culture that attracts and retains talented and skilled people, who form a cohesive and committed community with a common purpose, a community of engagement.

1. Be nice: The fact is that nice people are better liked and better liked people have it easier than those who make it difficult to like them.

2. Be positive: Negativity attracts negativity. Start complaining and you'll find plenty of company. Fortunately, the same holds true to being positive.

3. Avoid the gossip. Don't spread rumors. Don't join in on complaining about coworkers or your boss or working conditions or even the selection in the vending machines. Gossip breads discontent in the environment and in you as well.

4. Avoid gossipers. They might have a juicy tidbit to share with you but what are they saying about you to others?

5. Offer to help. If something isn't getting done properly or on time, offering to help accomplishes two things. The first is that it makes others aware that you are waiting in a way that is not offensive. The second is that you just might get what you need a little sooner. If needing to help becomes a constant, discuss it with your supervisor under the guise of your coworker being overworked.

6. Do what you can to make it easier for those whose work follows yours in the process chain. If you can save someone time or effort by alphabetizing something or resorting the data for their use or making a small extra effort to make the next step just a little easier, (even if you don't really like the person who benefits) the whole work environment can improve.

7. Please and Thank You are magic words. Use them often and mean them when you do.

Joseph Onesta is a speaker and consultant. His company, Integrity HPI, works with organizations making the work experience better for people and companies.

The Office Holiday Party, An Event to Remember or One You'd Rather Forget

The bosses say they want you to have fun but stay on the safe side. You are still at work. Remembering some simple etiquette guidelines will help make this year's office party an event to remember and not one you would rather forget.

Don't get drunk! The office party may be free flowing with holiday "spirits" but the line between acceptable and unacceptable behavior is far less blurry if you keep your wits about you. A drink or two probably won't hurt, you know your limit, but the office party is not a night out with good friends. Office relationships have been permanently damaged and people have even lost their jobs for things they have said or done at the office party.

Dress appropriately; you are still at work. It is nice to get dressed up but save the really sexy attire for truly social events. You do not want to be the object of unwelcome attention during the party and you don't want to be the subject of all the gossip after.

If you are a manager, you have to go. It is a mistake to think you can opt out of this event. If you have supervisory responsibilities, you are a host to the people you supervise. If you do not attend the party, you will send a message that communicates your lack of commitment your team and the company. While at the party, make sure you greet each of your reports and thank them for the job they have done and try an be specific about a particular incident in which they performed exceptionally well.

Gifts are not appropriate. No one wants to be saddled with having to carry or watch over a gift while they are supposed to be having a good time. Management may announce awards or special recognitions but the gifts, if they are anything more cumbersome than a gift card, should be handled at the office. If you want to give your supervisor a gift for the holidays, you should do so at the office, unobtrusively and in such a way that the receiver does not feel obligated to reciprocate.

Avoid cliquish behavior. It is natural to want to be with the people you feel most comfortable and you should sit with your teammates for the meal if one is served. This will help your team to function more cohesively and allows you to see one another in a different context. However, spending the entire event with them deprives you of a very unique opportunity. Others who may want to speak with you might find it difficult to approach you because they are not part of your group. You want to make yourself as approachable as possible. Politely excuse yourself from the group, mention that you would like to wish the CEO a happy holiday and go off and mingle.

Mingle. Mingle. Mingle. The office party is an opportunity to meet people in the organization with whom you do not normally get to interact. Advancement in the business world is a function of others thinking as highly of you as a person as they might of your skills. Take the opportunity to meet others and let them meet you. If you have to inject yourself into a group that appears cliquish, do so under the pretext of wishing them all happy holidays. Introduce yourself, tell them where you work in the organization and shake hands with everyone in the group. Try and remember their names and greet them with full eye contact and a smile in the hallways the next time you see them at the office. You will build allies throughout the organization who can make your job easier today and help get you promoted tomorrow.

Don't forget the CEO. Extend your mingling to those high level managers and senior managers with whom you may not normally interact. You do not have to carry on long conversations. Just introduce yourself. Offer a good firm, not crushing, handshake. Remind them where you work in the organization and if you have received a company bonus or gift, thank them for it. Wish them a good holiday and be on your way. Acknowledge them at the office as you would anyone else. In order for you to become one of them, they have to feel comfortable with you in that position.

The two most critical elements in getting better assignments and more challenging or interesting projects are having a higher level "sponsor"--that is someone who remembers you and thinks of you as they are discussing assignments and being a respected and well-liked person. The company party is a great time to make a positive impression.

If you are invited to be someone's guest at his or her office party, dress well, be friendly and avoid the booze. You are not there to have a good time. Your goal is to look good, be polite and stand quietly next to your date and let him or her make a good impression.

Keep these simple guidelines in mind and when after-party gossip is bantered around the break room, they won't be talking about you. The next buzz just may be about your promotion.

Joseph Onesta, M.A. is a speaker, trainer and consultant working in the field of Human Performance Improvement. His company, Integrity HPI helps companies develop an "employer of choice" work culture and environment, by improving performance through focused strategies, enriched work/life balance and enhanced communication. You are invited to visit http://www.integrityhpi.com to learn more about Integrity HPI's services and subscribe to their free e-newsletter, Balanced Life Tips.