Sunday, January 11, 2009

Steps of Faith....

At the root of all of the practical considerations and obligations we juggle day to day, lay four essential aspects of an individual’s life. They are the physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual parts of our lives and as we proceed, we learn that finding balance between these four is our critical challenge. When we think of balancing our lives we often consider what we can do to achieve better balance. A lot of our talk is about steps we can take.

While most often considered a spiritual force, it is not reserved for religious purposes. When we take a step in faith, we are using an internal power that has the potential to change everything. We should use it wisely.

On a recent channel surf through my cable selections, I happened upon one of those now ubiquitous weight loss programs which focus on extremely obese people and their struggle to lose weight. The show featured a woman who, with evidence of before and after photos, demonstrated that before she had children, she was young and svelte. After giving birth her busy life working and caring for her children lead to gaining a pound here and there. Eventually she was so fat a film crew became interested in her. She blamed her obesity on having children.

I do not discount the weight women gain in pregnancy. Nor do I minimize the effort required to lose that weight after childbirth. My point is that to blame her obesity on having children completely discounts the fifteen or twenty years of emotions, attitudes and behaviors that are more likely the cause of her obesity. She has placed herself in a kind of prison, the bars of which are created by her own belief.

When she acts on that belief, she is, in a very powerful way, taking a step of faith. Faith does not necessarily imply God at the other end of it. Certainly, adhering to religious principals is an act of faith but faith and religion are two different things. Faith is a human tool that we all use. Every time we act or react because we believe something, we are stepping in faith. Tightrope walkers, for example, step out onto the rope believing that they can and will cross the rope safely. Their belief is well-founded on the hours of practice they have had but every tightrope walker is aware of the potential danger of falling. They simply do not believe that they will fall. If they believed that they were going to fall, they would never step out onto the rope.

The unfortunate thing for a lot of religious folks is that they associate faith with God or a miracle from God and leave it at that. There is a very real reason why many people ask God for a miracle and never get it. Faith itself is the miracle they are waiting for. When we learn to use faith appropriately, we unleash a power, call it spiritual if you like, that enables us to achieve our goals and aspirations.

When we are willing to take risks, however we define them; it is because we believe something is either possible or impossible. The trick is discerning the difference between what we know to be true and what we think or feel is true.

Some people think you need courage to take risks. That is not true. You need courage to face danger. You need faith to take risks. Risk and danger are two different things and so are faith and courage. It takes courage to run into a burning building to save a child. It takes faith to believe you can do it at all.

Every time I step in front of an audience, I act in faith believing that the audience will benefit from my speech, enjoy my performance and my client will consider my fee to be money well spent. It is like walking out on a tightrope. I have plenty of practice but the possibility of my failing is there. So, public speaking is a kind of risk I am willing to take.

It is easy to see faith involved in actively taking risks. We also need to see that faith is equally involved in not taking them and this is ultimately the point I am at pains to make. When we decide to not do something it is often because we believe that we will fail. In some cases, that is good. I will never step out on a tightrope since I am absolutely convinced I would fall off. That being said, what achievable goals or dreams am I avoiding simply because I have an unfounded, even irrational belief in failure?

If there is an aspect of our lives with which we are growing uncomfortable, if anything at all is going to change, we need to pay attention to what it is we believe about it. Once we clear up what we believe about the things we would like to change, the most formidable obstacles are gone.

It may sound like hocus pocus, psychobabble or even new age religion but the truth is that we act as a result of what we believe. We live our lives doing some things, avoiding others and likely wishing we could someday do still others all because of what we believe about the world, about other people and about ourselves and yes, even what we believe about God. Those beliefs may or may not be factual but we make them real to us.

We all have a spiritual side to our lives. It is that part of us that helps us cope with the unknown and, within the context of our own lives, the unknowable. Science gnaws away at the unknown but any honest scientist will admit that there is a lot we do not know. Until we know absolutely everything that is knowable, we will continue to take steps of faith, acting or not acting based on what we believe to be true.

So we are all stuck with faith of one sort or another. Faith is not something you can create, build up or muster but it is a natural part of being human. We act on it every day. Along our journey to find happiness, balance and purpose in life, we would do well to consider what it is we believe about every situation, condition or obstacle we face.

Joseph Onesta is a speaker, trainer and consultant. He publishes a free e-newsletter called Balanced Life. His company, Integrity HPI partners with companies to develop an "employer of choice" work environment.

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